I Have Never Been So Nervous!!!

Ohhh my gosh, I seriously can’t believe that in just one day I will be having my own personal boudoir photo shoot…. I know, I know, I know.. I should take my own advice and follow what I preach but you know the saying “do as I say, not as I do” yeahhhhhh  sooo me lol!!!
nervous about photo shootWell I am finally stepping in front of the camera to truly experience what my client goes through for boudoir photo shoot. You would probably think that as a photographer who loves this type of photography that she wouldn’t be nervous at all I mean I know that it is going to be hard work posing, and you would think that I wouldn’t have issues figuring out what to wear but that is sooooooo far from the truth!!! Let me start from the beginning…
I follow this amazing photographer Teri from Teri Hofford Photography and she is from Canada.  What drew me to her photography is that she shoots all sizes of women and they all look amazing!!! Now this is something I am a firm believer in that all women are beautiful and sometimes we just need someone to remind us of it!  But anyways I always said if she ever came to MN that I would have her photograph me.  Her work just really spoke to me and I knew that she would be able to help me feel comfortable and beautiful even though I am a big girl.  So about a month or two ago she posted saying that she is coming to MN and that she had some spots available for photo shoots as well as mentoring and I hopped right on FB and messaged her and signed up for both.  I knew this was just meant to be since it was going to be birthday on the day that I will be photographed.  What better gift can I give myself then an opportunity to get  to feel sexy, and fierce have my hair and makeup done, and dance and laugh with a couple of girls, what can be so bad about that right???
Nothing wrong with that except that I am going to have hardly any clothes on… all of my rolls, dimples, scars and stretch marks ( that I have even though I don’t have kids) and insecurities are going to be visible.  I am going to be vulnerable, extremely vulnerable. I am thinking what the heck did I just do, can I really go through with this, who would want these pictures of me when I am size 28?  Why would anyone think that I am beautiful or sexy or even pretty? I have so many lumps and bumps and the shortest legs possible… how is she ever going to be able to pose ME? These are all thoughts that are running through my head… But what about all of things that I tell the ladies I photograph… Everyone has beauty in them and deserve to feel beautiful even me….I deserve this even though I am curvy, I still deserve to feel sexy.
So I decide to try and distract myself by figuring out what I should wear, lingerie for plus size women is getting better but it is still difficult to find well fitting pieces  Lane Bryant, Torrid, Hips and Curves have been a life saver for me!!  I think I have some cute outfits and lots of jewelry…. but I have these thigh high stockings from Kix’ies (Best and most comfortable thigh high stockings ever) that I am trying to figure out what to wear with them….  Would love any suggestions! 🙂 Anyways I have way more outfits than I need but I figure Teri and I will discuss and talk about the best fitting lingerie to use in the photos!!

 Kix' ies thigh highs  plaid

Yes I am still nervous it is a worry nervous and an excited nervous, but I just keep breathing and putting my faith in Teri and her team, I know that these photos are going to be amazing… I hope you follow along my journey of discovering my sexy, fierce, independent, beautiful self.  If you would like to start your own journey of reminding yourself these things please contact me! I would love to help you find your sexy self!


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